(Heidy Ho Twinklestars! Glad you could come! You don't mind if we do a bit of a fairy tale mash-up, just to be different do ya? I thought not..you being you and all! Please, pour yourself a cup of tea and join me for some madness-already-in-progress.. Can you guess my two favorite tales?)
Dorothy-Alice (a nice name for a nice girl) was beside herself with excitement. "It's here, Toto!" she said to her pet rabbit. "Our invitation to the party of the year! The Mad Hatter Tea Party in Bizarre Arizona! Aren't we so very lucky?"
And just as Toto was about to agree, there came a fierce crazy wind, the likes of which neither of them had ever seen.
"Quick Toto! Head for that rosebush and hold on tight! ~Why, it's raining square snowflakes! How very strange!"
When the colorful deluge ceased, Dorothy-Alice peeked out past the rose bush, and realized they weren't in Kansas anymore......"Bbb-bbut, where-where are we, Toto?"
(To which Toto just shrugged, as Toto was a rabbit of the non-speaking variety. Also, he was pretty sure they were not in Kansas to begin with, but decided that point was moot now).
Dorothy-Alice and Toto walked along (well, rather, Toto sort of hippity-hopped) and soon discovered they weren't the only ones lost.
"How curious!" she said to herself.
The creatures standing before her all started talking at once, but, finally she was able to make heads-and-tails of what they said.
"Hello, my name is v- v- V-Vincent. Do you bite? Oh please don't bite me, I beg of you! I'm a bbbit of a Scaredy Cat. I'm off to see the Hatter, the wonderful Hatter of AZ, at least I hope he's wonderful, and not too scary, so I can ask him to please please give me courage-oh oh-your rabbit is creeping me out-does Toto bite?"
Alice and Toto shook their heads (as non-threateningly as one can).
Just then the next one spoke up.
"Hi! I'm McHootie, and I want to ask the Hatter for Wisdom, as owls are supposed to be wisdomish, but dear me, dear dear me, i just don't know if I'm wise enough, and sometimes I think maybe people think I'm less like an owl and more like a dodo."
The last weeling spoke. "Well, hello, Dorothy-Alice. The name is Lysander, and I am rather tired of broken promises and wishes that don't come true. So I'm going to ask the Hatter for a new heart. Why don't you join us, since we're all going the same place?"
And so she did.
It wasn't long until they came across a rather intriguing sight. A lovely girl in a gypsy wagon and witch's hat, with a vast collection of curious things.
Lysander made a bit of a noise, a combination sigh and coo, and before anyone could ask what he was doing, he had asked for and received an invitation from Winnie, the Gypsy Witch, keeper of lost secrets and forgotten memories, to join her in her wagon, and as she talked they gazed into each others eyes-nay into the very depths of each other's souls.
"Ah.. can you believe the treasures people leave along the path? Things taken for granted, memories that should be cherished, love that should be revered...all strewn about like so much junk. It is good to see good in everything is it not? Otherwise these things may lie forgotten......"
"Yes. I think ..I think you have found something that I thought I lost...".
"You had it all along."
The others murmured amongst themselves; mainly about how, though this was definitely a PG13 kinda story, it could most certainly take a turn in a..well, in a heartbeat, and perhaps they should continue on and give the two lovebirds some time alone.....
"Um." said Lysander. "Ms. Winnie, I wonder-do you ever wish for company? I-I think I would like to stay with you. It would do my heart good to help the dreams of others find their way back home."
And so he did.
Before the others left, Winnie said she thought they might benefit from taking the fork in the road, rather than the straight path, as it was the one less traveled but always worth it in the end.
And so they did, and enjoyed themselves mightily (having run into a Starbucks-those things really *are* everywhere) when all of a sudden, their little entourage was attacked by.....
"Haaalpppp! Yikes! Eeeps!" squealed Vincent as he tried to hide behind Dorothy-Alice to no avail. "What will we do?"
"I believe they are trying to lead us somewhere," said McHootie. "I say we follow them."
So they did (with Vincent in the back of the line) and came across a wise owl, who beckoned McHootie near.
"Hey kid. Word in the trees is you are questioning your purpose-is that true?"
McHootie bowed his head and said:
"Well um, you're wise right? Tell me the answer, tell me what I should do?!"
Remarkably, the wise owl began to sing "Garden Party" by Ricky Nelson:
After which the merry little band of travelers and the flying monkeys applauded.
"Just be who you are kid, and you'll never go wrong. Also, take a left at the next Starbucks, and you'll be closer to your destination...."
The group thanked him mightily and took a left at the Starbucks (though Vincent really wanted to stop for another green tea latte, Dorothy-Alice was worried he would spoil his appetite for the tea party, and talked him out of it).
It wasn't long before they heard a noise, a peculiar kind of noise...like peeping...
"Holy Moly!" said Vincent. "It's the LollyPeep guild!"
"Er, lollipop guild?" asked Dorothy-Alice.
"No-the LollyPEEP Guild-I helped them unionize when the evil queen kept trying to play croquet with them..and not in a nice way." answered Vincent.
"YOU did??" asked everyone in unison, amazed at the thought of Vincent-the-Hero.When the Guild saw Vincent they all peep-squeaked in delight.
"Jeepers Peepers, gang, its Vincent! All hail the Peep King!"
"Me?" asked Vincent incredulously.
"Sure! You're the bravest cat we know!"
(Toto wondered idly if anyone but he had noticed Vincent was quite obviously not a scaredy cat or a cool cat, but rather a BEAR; but he figured maybe that was another story).
And so, Lysander found love, McHootiefound his wisdom, and Vincent had his courage. Hoorah!
But, Dear Reader, how did they make it to the tea party?
Easy. Toto called them a limo. (There's an app for that....)
And they all lived as happily ever after as possible what with ups and downs and laughter and tears and rain and sun and snow and fog (though no one ever saw one of those crazy freak square snowflake storms again).
The gang would love to say hi- just click your flip flop heels against each other and say: