{The Tale is in the Living}

  

Howdy twinklestars~

It's  afternoon and the weather is amazingly, blissfully perfect. Cowboy and I are on the back porch, mesmerized by the way the sun illuminates the spring green leaves, watching tiny white flowers fall from the pear tree, delighted by the big burly bees and wasps and little things buzzing around in the sky...

 

I can't believe it's the same tree that was covered in vivid orange-gold leaves during my last post. Things happen so fast....

 

 

I have something to tell you, and i hope you don't mind.

 

I have bloggy friends-SISTERS, really - who tell me "behind the scenes" that it is ok to share the not good stuff too. And, i think, they are right.

 

 

So the not good stuff is the dreaded C word. My beloved Cowboy has been diagnosed with esophageal cancer, which is fairly uncommon in the US, and usually not found until it has reached a later stage. In a staging range of I-IV, his is IVb. This means, sadly, it is inoperable. It has also metastisized, to his liver and lungs and lymph nodes far and wide.

For a very long two months it was tests and appointments and scans and bloodwork and procedures and outpatient and tons of paperwork and phone calls and emails and waiting waiting waiting..but all that is over and now we've settled into the business of living again.

Cowboy has been beyond incredible. From the very beginning, his concern has been for his family....things great and small. Imparting his wisdom, his advice. Strong for me as i fall apart.

 

 

He's not questioning God or asking why. He says the rest of the story is in the living. How we celebrate each minute here on out. When he hugs, he squeezes tight. We were eating at a different restaurant every night until he started chemo.  We slow danced to Dwight Yoakum under the big glowing moon.

 

 

Isn't it amazing how miniscule those usually nagging dust particles that make up the fabric of life become when you're too busy really living life to give them any thought?

So here we are, amazed beyond belief, now more than ever, at the power of nature and the beauty of spring. Every leaf and blade of grass, every tiny wisteria petal, we welcome and celebrate.

Thank you to everyone who has worried or wondered or emailed, who send love and prayers and good juju from all over the big blue marble. We appreciate each and every one of you. And to the one who reminded me, what the first line of my own bio says, I applaud you and your strength, too.

XOXO and lots of love from Roo & Cowboy

 

 

Comments

[rochambeau]

Dear Cowboy and Roo,
I'm really sorry.... Yet reading your words makes me realize how truly amazing you both are. Your inner power is strong and in the right place. I like your strengh and
will continue good thoughts and prayers for you both.
Lots of love from one of your bitsy twinkelstars~
Constance

[Linda Diane]

Dear Roo,

I don't know what prompted me to come over today. I was over reading Vanessa's comments (A Fanciful Twist for those who don't know), and I saw your name. I am very familiar with your name from V.'s comment section, so anyway, for some reason I just came on over here to check out your blog, and I was very sad and taken aback to see what you and Cowboy are facing. I just want you to know that I will be praying for you two. I think it is wonderful that you are enjoying life and not taking it for granted--a lesson for us all. Take care, you two, and big hugs. I will be visiting again.

[A Forest Frolic]

Hey Roo, just thinking of you today and thought I'd check your blog. We're keeping you and Cowboy in our thoughts and prayers still and love that you have such great outlooks on life and the little things. Hugs and smooches,

Jamie :)

[Stephanie]

well phew...
I applaud you for sharing, because I think...I hope, that you will find strength from those that visit here.

I will think of you and your Cowboy and send you bundles of good wishes, love and prayers.

I applaud too your spirit for life...go out and enjoy, every minute of it.

love,
steph

[shibori girl]

Dearest Roo,

There really are no words... you've expressed this terrible situation so beautifully. I'm very sorry you and your Darling Cowboy have to go through this, but your attitude is really lovely.

Stay strong, and hang onto your sense of humor.

I'm here for you if you want a shoulder,

{{{Hugs}}}

Kate

[somepinkflowers]

yes
you do know it---->
behind the scenes
we have already been sending you both
prayers of strength...

''no, really, i am a huge moon, i swear''

i know
i saw it 2
and when the next one rolls around
you & cowboy
must slow dance again to Dwight Yoakum
because
THAT
my friend
is living...

[a fanciful twist]

Roo,

I know I talk to you behind the scenes, but I just want to say here that, I just read your beautiful words. Filled with heartbreak and living, and good and sad, all rolled into a package called, a beautiful life...

You are my sister. You already know that. In so many ways you are a part of my family, a part of the wonderland in our hearts.

I almost fainted when I saw the tree and your post. You are right, spooky cool. We are connected.

I love you and cowboy, and all I can say is that, I will send up huge wishes and prayers that each moment of life is good and beautiful, and full. Magical and dripping with good now, and exquisite memory making.

I am always here, you know that.

All my heart, all my prayers - for you and cowboy. My heart is raw and open and feeling....for both of you.

Love, V

[Cori G.]

Dearest Beloved Roo,
You and your Cowboy have been in my thoughts and prayers each and every day. I know there are no words to give comfort to such a horrific ordeal, but know that you are loved and cherished as you go from day to day. Your Cowboy must be a truly amazing man to have the attitude that carries him through life. And I know that even when those we love are departed from us they still live in our hearts. Make memories today that will live on into your tomorrows.
I love you Roo

[Deborah]

Oh Roo, Oh Roo. Praying, never ceasing, lifting you and your beloved Cowboy up to The One Who knows all needs, golden threads spiraling up to heaven, marking the continuance of life Here to There, proof of life that never ends, a light that cannot be extinguished, life given by The One Who set the universe in motion. The door to Heaven has been opened, the banquet table has been set. Come as you are. May prayers and angels carry you both through this most holy time, as the outside world falls away and only you and Cowboy dance in the moonlight.
Sending you all of my love on the wings of a desert sparrow, Deb ♥♥♥

[Anne Lockard]

Dear Roo,

Deb sent me your way....I can use words no better than she, but know this; you and yours are cherished in the Eye of God, and are never alone even through the twilight times.
May you both be drawn together....may His love surround you.
Always.

XXOO~~♥
Anne