Roo's Treehouse

Employee Wellness

Well yes. Of course.

 

PICTURE THIS: It's nearly 5:30p.m. somewhere in workery world. There are less than a handful of us left, huddled in our offices, muttering to ourselves that we will get this one last thing off our desk before leaving No Matter What.

(I guess so we can make room for that which will grow overnight) ....

Although, sometimes, in a miraculous feat of Herculean effort, some people CATCH UP with their workload, and actually have TIME to Label any piles that may not require immediate attention, because the ball's in someone else's court, so-to-speak.  This is what's known as a MIRACLE.

And then, this SOMEONE (who is not me), leaves on time. 

(Which means SOMEONE'S office is vulnerable to ne'er do wells like me and Certain Partners in Crime Who Shall Remain Nameless To Protect the Not So Innocent.....)

Well. Obviously this is Someone who is going to need Something To Do, having some time on their hands, first thing in the morning.  A little direction, so to speak.

(Of course you can guess what they say-sit here, type here, drink this, answer that. My partner in crime and I were keeping it simple-we're state workers, after all...)

....plus the occasional oddities...

(why does my green postit look blue?)

And so, giggling madly, having done our part for Employee Wellness and Morale, we decided so too, should end another day in the world of Bureaucracy..

...while chaotic piles of our own remain post-it-less and growing.

{Insert dramatic sigh here}

xoxoxoxox Roo the Naughty

PS. Ah, the part which works with the Legal department is forcing me to post a disclaimer or two:

• I was not on work-time during the post-it debauchery. I repeat, I did not claim work-time.
  
• No post-it notes were harmed during the making of this joke.
• These post-its were a personal stash; therefore I actually aided the economy rather than wasting money.
  
• I promise to recycle.
  

PSS. Someone was kinda happy to see this joke had been brought down upon his office when Someone came in. Everyone enjoys a gentle practical joke every once in a while.

PSPS. This office is conveniently located across from the infamous joke bulletin board ( every work space has one right?). Lookit what happens when the Data guy gets ahold of it--patterns and symmetry and *update notifications*, oh my!!!

PSPSPS. <----I forget how this works. Anyway, though I am sure you will be tempted to point out that I probably coulda knocked some work off my to do list if I had used my ten minutes with some sorta concentrated effort and diligence, I submit to you Exhibit A:

NOT REALLY.

xoxoxoxo

DC Follies, the Sequel

(source cuz i am too lazy to take pics: public-domain-images.com)

Hello there twinklestars! In talking with a good friend yesterday about our "jean jackets with bling" years, I suddenly remembered I never told you the Rest Of The Story!!

You know, the one where I'm in Washington DC and in true Roo fashion ask Newt Gingrich if he is familiar with the area?

Oh yeah, there's more.

In our our previous episode , we left Roo & Her Partners in Crime traipsing through the streets of DC in an attempt to find the Other Important Building wherein a Press Conference of Magnificent Proportion was to occur. 

Editor's note: oh alright, it's me, I'm Roo, and now I'm just admitting it, and will here on out call myself me or I, rather than referring to myself in the third person, because calling myself Roo all the time is beginning to freak me out a little.

(wow awesome shot by Peter Griffin on Publicdomainpictures.net)

Ahem. Anyway~

Upon finding the other important place (which turned out to be not very difficult after all; just ask a cabbie-they know EVERYTHING), the Crew scattered and dispersed into the throng of suits, reporters, aides and pages. I scanned the room for a spot where i could observe everything while looking less conspicuous and more official. Like A Person In The Know.

Looking rather overwhelmed by all of the chaos and cameras, and standing alone in a corner, I spied a petite woman with dark hair. I imagined this woman to be wishing with all of her might that she could blend in with the walls, for you see, she was wearing a floral shift dress to the knees, boots, and a denim jacket.

To a high Powered Press Conference.

Well. We've all been there, right? Feeling completely out of place and wishing someone, anyone would come save us from our own embarrassment?

(Or maybe when dressing in the dark early in the morning when running late, it is a 98.8% certainty that one navy pump will be inexplicably matched up with one black one?)

Been there. Done that. Wore the t shirt inside out.

So, I am wondering how it came to be that she is the only one, even among persons in various degrees of patterned bathing rituals, working the TV cameras, wearing denim.

Whatever the reason, I was not going to let this poor woman feel out of place. No. This land is our land, by golly. Give us your tired, your poor, your under-dressed! The people's government, and she is a people, no matter what she wears! 

So I walk over to the timid denim jacket lady and strike up casual conversation, barely giving her a chance to answer. "Hi! How are you? First time in DC? Did you get to see any of the sights? Cold enough for you? Do you have kids? How many? Do they have interests? Piano and soccer, good for them!"

I keep her talking.

I notice people circling. I give them my best "back off!" stare. You know how the press can be. And DC isnt known as the city of hospitality. Good thing I'm wearing The Suit Of Armor. 

Out of the corner of my eye I see Binnie, frantically motioning to me from the back of the room. I wave and give her the thumbs up. I think perhaps its about to start and she wants me to snag a good seat up front. I ask Jean Jacket if she would like to join us. She politely declines.

I make my way to the seat just as not yet Vice President Joe Biden arrives, and the air in the room physically changes and a cliched hush falls upon the crowd, and everyone stops what they are doing, except cameras are popping and snapping and rolling and microphones appear out of nowhere and he begins to speak. He gives us background on the Violence Against Women Act (he was instrumental in the passage of the original bill, fifteen years ago last September), and informs us of new partnerships between nonprofits and private companies to upgrade technology for the national domestic violence hotline.

It is at this point that it dawns on me. Oh my goodness. Jean Jacket. She is a survivor of domestic violence, who has come to tell us her story. Survivors share their compelling stories of horror and triumph, the struggle and journey to healing and freedom. I look at her again, still standing in the corner, sort off to the right of the podium, and I smile encouragingly, marveling at her poise and her quiet strength and dignity. 

She gives me a one eyebrow raise and a sort of half smile.

And now not yet VP Biden is talking about struggle, and the hardships these women face, and the harrowing violent experiences they go through. I am thinking he is being a little insensitive to her plight, and hoping he doesn't accidentally traumatize her before bringing her to the podium.

But no- now he's speaking of music, and how music is often the best advocate for garnering empathy and support for hard to discuss issues. In particular he mentions "Broken Wing" by Martina McBride. I nod knowingly, trying to pick out the melody in my head. I'm not much of a country music listener, but i am sure i have heard it. The woman who sings it is-

she's very-

she's petite. And wears a great big ol diamond the size of Texas on her finger.

and on the day i met her, looked elegant in a denim jacket and a little floral dress and boots.

(Shine on Ms. McBride, shine on)

And that is why I live in Florida.

The end.

SOTU, DC, Power Suits & Roo

(What, doesn't everyone have a new years bush waiting to be turned into valentines branches?)

hi twinklepeeps!how are you?

I was watching the State of The Union (aka #SOTU for us tweeties) and offer this compelling wrap-up: President Barack Obama can make speeches, is adorable, has a gorgeous wife, and wore a tie that looked a wee bit like it was his Christmas candy cane lookalike tie. Oh, and we're about to get this party started. Troops will come home. Bankers will pay. We'll be healthy, green, and debt free. We've never been better. Life will be good.

Also, purple/lavender/eggplant is so in this year it is not even funny. Run, don't walk, to get yourself some purple in your wardrobe STAT.  Apparently the big #1 on the Cabinet meeting agenda this morning was Pelosi and Biden color coordinating the subtle shades of grape. (Michelle went with Eggplant-i think it's from the White House Garden/Anti Obesity Collection).

Saucy's idea, rather deep I thought, was perhaps all the purple was the melding of red & blue together, like a symbolic bipartisan crayolanic gesture.

RED + BLUE = PURPLE

And so, feeling all jiggy with the state of the universe, I was compelled to tell y'all a little Roo bedtime story. About my adventures in DC a few years ago. Long enough ago to laugh about it now....

Once upon a time, Roo was sent to Washington DC, by People Who Didn't Know Any Better, to advocate for federal support for domestic violence screening in health facilities, because it most certainly is a public health issue, and Roo knew a little something something about implementing screenings in every county health department in Florida, oh yes she did.

So she went to DC on a big ol airplane, and upon landing, was quite mesmerized by the hustle and bustle of that busy place. Also, it was mighty cold, and statues and old buildings and monuments and memorials outnumbered Starbucks coffee shops and CVS pharmacies by a formidable margin, so she knew there must be Super Important Things Going Down In This Town.

But I digress.

Anyhoo, Roo and some cohorts traveled to the the Place where  "I'm just a Bill/Sittin here on Capitol Hill" was made (shout out to Schoolhouse Rock!) and talked up the President of the American Medical Association and various and sundry congresspersons and their aides, and then met with then not yet Vice President Joe Biden, who clasped my hand and God Blessed Me for my work, and then invited me to a press conference he was having in a few minutes~

which of course we decided we had to attend. But it wasn't in the Capitol (aka land of a thousand checkpoints), it was in one of those other important buildings, and Roo & Crew had to figure out how to get there, but didn't ask Mr B before he got on the super cool and swank elevator for Bigwigs Only. So, we wandered back out onto the street, and this friend, we'll call her Binnie cuz that's her name, Binnie says, Hey there's some sort of secret underground subway thingy that the Bigwigs use to go from building to building! if we could find it we could get there super fast!

So Roo, who was wearing her Ann Taylor red power suit, strode purposefully up to two guys standing on the corner and says, excuse me, gentleman, but are you familiar with the area?

To which one snickers madly, and the other looks me straight in the eyes, and says why yes, i am a little.

So i (er, I mean Roo) starts trying to bluff my (her) way into VIP RockStar status and bottom line was, he was onto Roo, and politely suggested she and her obviously up to no good cronies tittering in the background take the subway that Joe Public used (where have i heard that phrase since?)

So i thanked him and went back to my Crew only to get sucker punched on the shoulder by lets call her Binnie who says do you know what you just did?

...and i being rather impressed with myself, all savvy and cool in my suit says um, asked for directions?

To which Binnie says, Noooo, you asked NEWT GINGRICH if he was familiar with the area! 

Whereupon, Roo the Mortified turned to look at the Former Speaker of the House Leroy Newton "Newt" Gingrich...who winked at me. 

But that wasn't my only DC debacle, oh no, not by a long shot. Stay tuned for part 2 in which Roo makes a heel of herself at a press conference.

Good night, and God Bless America.

P to the S:

xoxox my twinklestars!thanks 4 all of the love and emails!